I remember

I remember yesterday.

I- me myself and half a microwave

Remember- the opposite of Alzheimer's with a pocket protector and a squished potato

Yesterday- past tense of tomorrow and equal or lesser than the curvature of the sun

Albany grey

An amazing poem by Albany grey

(Flowers included)

great timing, kid

i remember the last time i saw you.

we were singing that song, and i was singing it wrong.

and i bet you called it sentimental,

but i called it apathetic.

I might have thought differently before, but you lost me last november,

'cause i hadn't seen you in months,  and i knew that wouldn't change after just one day.

i knew a lot more about you than you me.

and that won't ever change.

 because the timing was always wrong,

and i'm so grateful for that.

How to feel alive.

Kill someone.

You'll NEVER feel more ALIVE

I heart you

Yes I do have a heart. They say it beats 115,200 times a day. But mine beats one less every time I kiss you.   Damn this mirror is cold

Final destination

Water... Earth... Fire... Air. Long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked. Only the Avatar, master of all four elements, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished. A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, an airbender named Brandon Ahlstrom. And although his airbending skills are great, he still has a lot to learn before he's ready to save anyone. But I believe Brandon can save the world.

True love

One day Scott got into a huge fight with his parents and couldn't take it anymore. So he stole his dad's car and ran away. He picked up his girl and started driving south towards California.  And started driving West towards California,  they drove all night until they reach to the beach. they spent the rest of the night drinking margaritas and cuddling on the beach until the LSD wore off and he was dragging a stolen manikin around Wendy's parking lot drinking out of the sprinklers

How to fix a relationship

Things that you will need:
1. Duct tape
2. Hand cuffs
3. Bubble gum
4. Unmarked van
5. Ski mask (optional)
6. Newspaper
7. Watermelon

So let's say that your female friend  decides that she's had enough and wants to hit the road. But you still love her. And you try to get back together but she don't want you no mo. This is how you solve your love life problems.
It works 40% of the time, every time.

       Step 1, when your woman started using words like "we need to talk","I need some space" or "I think we should take a break" that's when you pull out your handy dandy pocket hand cuffs and cuff yourself to her. So she will be stuck with you no matter what.

       Step 2, now that your female is cuffed to you, and not able to go talk to other thirsty guys. This is when you use bubble gum.  Fill that woman's mouth with tons of bubble gum so she can't talk and isn't able to break up with you.

       Step 3, call up your buddy and tell him to meet at bravo point with the van.  Then get in the van And set up a newspaper just in case she needs to go to the bathroom.

       Step 4, possibly 5 cuz I'm and idiot and I have lost count. Get comfortable beacause it might take a while for her to comply. To pass time, use the duct tape to wax your legs for a swim meet next week. After she agrees to your terms and conditions, than your business is done  and you can let her go. And give her a watermelon as a token of your love

Try doing steps 1-4 with a ski mask on and don't say anything, and see if your results change